Last week I started texting with a woman from California. We talked late one night and I found myself frequently referring to my recent past as “a few years ago.” It seems everything in my life happened a few years ago – all of my dating history falls into this category, my recent jobs, my…
Category: Relationships
Thoughts and Readings on Being in a Healthy Relationship
Going a Few Rounds
It’s football season, which means my dad and stepmom have been coming to the house on home-game weekends. The last few times they’ve visited, I’ve felt this urge – at the end of the night before I go to bed – to want to call or text someone as part of some end-of-day unwind conversation….
Attention and Avoidance
The other day I went to the pet store. I needed to get treats and poop bags. In one end and out the other. 120 poop bags – that’s almost two months’ worth of shit that I’ve committed to picking up. The cashier was new and wasn’t sure how to exit the current register screen…
How We Disagree
I wish people who love each other would say to each other, when they fight, “Please – a little less love, and a little more common decency.” -Kurt Vonnegut When my stepmom asks my dad if the heat is still on, he responds by asking in a mocking and almost harsh tone, “What’s wrong? Are…
Reflections on Reflections
I’ve been stuck. In another tab, I have a rambling mess of a blog post that I’ve been playing with for an hour or two each day for the past four or five days (very similar to this one). I keep adding and deleting, cutting here, mixing there. It has paragraphs that end mid-way through…
Wanting to Be Missed (Part Two), Except Not Really
I love you for shattering.Someone has to. -Dean Young Six new books of poetry arrived yesterday. This morning, with a steady rain tickling the leaves outside, I sat by an open window and started in on Bender: New & Selected Poems by Dean Young. A few weeks ago Young passed away. I had never read…
Empty Pillows
It’s 11:00 pm on a Tuesday night in August. The temperatures feel like early fall and the windows are open. From the kitchen I can hear the hum of the refrigerator, but mostly I hear the outside chorus of crickets and katydids and the occasional car passing by. Earlier tonight I sat on the deck…
The Affair
The other morning, instead of scrolling Twitter and Facebook and reading the news – or more accurately, doing less of those things – I spent my time revising poems and researching the submission guidelines of a few journals. I still didn’t hit submit, but this was a step. I have continued to add to my…
The Long and Short of My Tiny Anxieties
I get anxious about things. Not super anxious, but anxious. I get anxious about going to new places or not being on time. I get anxious about leaving. I get anxious about trying things I haven’t done before or things I’m not good at (dancing, golf, roller skating) – especially if people are watching. I…
Chemistry and Stars
The text conversation began … “I wanted to match with you first and tell you that your first date description gave me a little bit of the goosebumps because it’s been a while since I’ve had that kind of a first date.” Over the July 4th holiday weekend we went out. We had a good…
June 16, 2018
Four years ago I went on a first date that ended up changing the course of what I consider to be my second adult life. I suppose if I take a butterfly effect view of life, I could argue that I’ve gone on lots of first dates that changed the course of my life –…