From our formative attachments to our great loves, relationship is the seedbed of our becoming, the laboratory of our self-invention and reinvention. Maria Popova I had a couple of hours on my hands last night. I didn’t go out. I intended to write. I’m finding I’m more productive in the mornings (like this morning). I…
Category: Relationships
Thoughts and Readings on Being in a Healthy Relationship
FOR THE SAKE OF HABIT
Rough and tumble storms have been rolling through Memphis this morning. It’s in the mid-sixties, there’s a lot of thunder and lightening. Seems a bit crazy for January. Yesterday I read that an organization in Australia made dire predictions for climate change – basically saying that by 2050, civilization will collapse in to chaos because…
GRIEF AND A CELEBRITY SIGHTING (SORTA)
This morning, after my run (yay to me for finding time), I settled in to an article I had set aside to read: The Strangeness of Grief by V. S. Naipaul. I am, at times, obsessed with the subject. It’s not something I’ve ever really experienced, at least not on the level of what I’ve…
I DON’T NEED ALONE TIME. IS THAT A BAD THING?
Today I’m thinking about a few competing / complimentary ideas. I’m thinking about love as a creative act. I’m thinking about my writing habits and some of the interests I haven’t pursued. I’m thinking about my next relationship. I’m thinking about my social side. The common thread seems to be defining who I am as…
THE BEAUTY OF BANAL PLATITUDES
For the past three mornings I’ve sat at the kitchen table at my dad’s house where I’ve dipped toast in sunny side up eggs and drank my coffee and ate my bacon. On the wall opposite of where I sit, next to the light switch is a little placard that reads in cursive: Live, Laugh,…
DOING JUSTICE TO OUR COMPLEXITY
I’m slowly falling in love with reading and writing. There are days when I want to call out sick just to have time to read, write, feel, relax. After last night’s post, and this morning’s edits, I realized that I’ll have done work related networking functions four nights in a row (Sunday – Wednesday). And…
EFT: GROWING TOGETHER
I’m going to start off by suggesting that you read Sue Johnson (Real Love Stories) – then come back. Any notions I have about the psychology of relationships almost always start with my own experiences and then branch out in to a series of questions along the lines of, if I’m feeling this, surly my…
VERONICA AND THE WARS WITHIN
Before moving to Memphis I had started reading Veronica by Mary Gaitskill. I had come across some clippings from the book on goodreads – I was, I’m sure, looking for quotes on love or loss. I remember coming across this one and thinking this, to some extent, is my ex-fiancee, B. I wanted to know…
I AM NOT THE HERO: REFLECTIONS ON CONFIDENCE
In another post, I published my dating profile. I have absolutely no interest in dating, but it’s by far the easiest way for me to meet new people – though I do ok out at bars and social situations. My profile is effective at getting dates – a little less so in getting friends (that…
THANKSGIVING 2018
Ever since getting in to the habit of writing every day, I’m finding that I want to spend more and more time writing. I will always struggle with the self criticism, and I will always struggle with the question – why should anyone care? I can’t answer that question, other than to say, you shouldn’t…
A QUIET TYPE OF COMFORT
Last night my friend Stacy and I went out for drinks and a bite. I met up with her and two of her friends, a slightly older lesbian couple. We went to South of Beale, a local bar just down the street from my office. It was a really nice evening, and her friends were…
THE MEASURE OF LOVE IS TRANSFORMATION
I’m happy to be writing every day. The last few days, it’s been how I’ve spent the bulk of my time. This morning, I find myself wanting to tackle a few topics, and not really knowing where to start, not really sure how this post will meander and take shape (obviously with a useless prologue…