With the lights out, the cell phone turned upside-down on the night stand, and my eyes not yet closed, I felt this strange yearning for guidance… it was somewhere between wanting to pray (something I don’t do) and a quiet call into the void. I picked up the phone and typed: Dear god…. In writing…
There’s a Twitter in the Atmosphere
The students are back. Everything is more crowded. I bought a new piece of original art, and I’m temporarily filled with moments of Sunday determination – the elation and motivation of which soon will pass. None of those things are related, it’s just part of the weather report, an indication of my current atmospheres…. oh,…
Final Days: A Few Steps Closer to Home
Songs and smells can sometimes yank you back and sometimes subtly glide and guide you through the thin fog of memory to other places and times… distant shores of past lives. For my father, every time he hears “Hey Nineteen” by Steely Dan, he mentions Fort Devens and his time in the Army. I suspect…
Writing and Love: Let the Children Play
I often feel a little off, guilty, and/or embarrassed after sharing something confessional and personal. That audience thing nags at me… I ask myself: am I ok, by which I mean comfortable, with other people knowing these things about me? Family, co-workers, friends? The answer is almost always no, I’m not comfortable with any of…
Empty Pillows
It’s 11:00 pm on a Tuesday night in August. The temperatures feel like early fall and the windows are open. From the kitchen I can hear the hum of the refrigerator, but mostly I hear the outside chorus of crickets and katydids and the occasional car passing by. Earlier tonight I sat on the deck…
Birthday 2022
Today is my birthday. While not there yet, I’m inching closer to one of the big ones – fifty. Sometimes, my age catches me by surprise. In some respects, I still feel like a kid or like I’m stuck in this early adult phase of life (like I’m in my 20s or 30s)… Maybe it’s…
The Affair
The other morning, instead of scrolling Twitter and Facebook and reading the news – or more accurately, doing less of those things – I spent my time revising poems and researching the submission guidelines of a few journals. I still didn’t hit submit, but this was a step. I have continued to add to my…
Becoming Disequipped
At some point in the day, almost every day, I sit at my computer and think I should write a poem. Except it never works that way. I suppose “never” is an exaggeration…. it just seems like if I sit down with the intention of writing a poem, I sit there and stare. One writer/teacher…
Beach Day in the Afterlife
I spent this past weekend at the beach. I love being near the ocean. I like walking near water. I think differently when I’m near the water. It was a nice, but all too short, getaway. I snapped a decent picture on Sunday morning before the beach was crowded – when the only people on…
The View from Out Here
Being sick got the best of me these past few days. On Sunday, I wrote that I should do some chores and send some poems out for publication. I managed to find the dead mouse, throw some things away, and run the vacuum. By the time I was done, I was in a cold sweat…
The Long and Short of My Tiny Anxieties
I get anxious about things. Not super anxious, but anxious. I get anxious about going to new places or not being on time. I get anxious about leaving. I get anxious about trying things I haven’t done before or things I’m not good at (dancing, golf, roller skating) – especially if people are watching. I…