I’m no more ready to lose my buddy that I was yesterday. Despite a trip to the vet, I’m no closer to knowing what the issue is than I was last night. Nick, my cat, is still not eating, still kinda dazed, and now a little stand-offish. I know it was a rough day for…
Category: Life
Not Ready
It’s 11:30 at night – Tuesday. Nick, my cat and occasional fluffy alarm clock didn’t wake me up this morning. He usually gets me up sometime around 5. He’s been unwell lately. He’s not eating as much. Tonight he seems to be sneezing more than usual and seems dazed. I tried to get him to…
Walking with Your Tribe
“If you find yourself having to tiptoe around others you’re not walking with your tribe.”
More of the Same
It’s dark out. I can see the silhouette of a dog against the sliding back door light of the house behind mine. I can’t tell if the dog is waiting to be let in or waiting to be let out. My cat, Nick, is sitting on the floor a few feet away from me. His…
Morning Reverie
For the life of me, I can’t remember what the fight was about. Needing space on one side, needing affirmation on the other. A push and pull until someone ran and someone else gave chase. The things I remember – the gut punch feeling in the morning when she said it was over. The attempts…
And Everything in Between
On Wednesday, January 6th, I woke up early-ish, ate breakfast, and sat down to write. I had read an article about the link between narcissistic mothers and complex PTSD in their daughters/children. I was engaged to a woman who suffered from something close to complex PTSD and had a difficult relationship with her mother. I…
I Get by with a Little Help from My…
For most of my adult life, I’ve never really had that close, everyday type of friendship with someone other than a romantic partner. I joke that I don’t have any friends – but it’s more of an uncomfortable cover-up and slight admission of truth than it is a joke. Way back in high school, I…
In This Very Moment
Last night I sat by the warm light of a table lamp reading, thinking, and clicking and unclicking a pen. It, the pen, had a push button on the top, and a release button on the side. Push the top, click, the pen appears. Push the side release, click, the pen recedes. I appreciated the…
If Only in My Dreams
I’ll be home for ChristmasYou can plan on mePlease have snow and mistletoeAnd presents by the tree I got out two frying pans and a mixing bowl along with the bacon, eggs, and brioche and asked Alexa to play Christmas music. The first song to play was the Bing Crosby version of “I’ll Be Home…
Christmas Eve 2020
I’ve been staring at a blank screen / “page” for about 20 minutes. Nothing. It’s Christmas Eve and doesn’t feel like it. I feel like anything I write should be full of gratitude – as though the season demands it. And I think this year a lot of people are struggling to muster up gratitude….
Social Media as a Toxic Relationship: It’s Complicated
I have a love / hate relationship with social media. I think a lot of people do. It’s a thing I love to hate and hate to love. I love that I find out about things: concerts, events, and what’s going on in the lives of friends and family. I love that I get three…