Monday, 2:14 AM. That’s when my phone buzzed with an email from MyAnalytics – a type of productivity software that seems to be tied in with my Microsoft Office account. The tagline under the logo reads “Discover your habits. Work smarter.” I can’t imagine that waking me up in the middle of the night (I have occasional insomnia and couldn’t fall back asleep for about an hour) is going to help me “work smarter.” The next email came at 4:53 AM from Cortana, another “productivity and insight” feature tied in with Microsoft. The headline of this email read “Hi Matt, Hope you had time to recharge.” Not if I’m getting emails at 4:53 AM. I finally got up and out of bed at 5:45 when Sean Allen (someone I don’t know) emailed his sales pitch “Not a habit of mine to give up without getting a yes or a no.” It’s a no, Sean… and if I remember to do it, you’re getting filed with the junk email. Monday mornings can be bad enough. Being woken up three times by emails that aren’t even legitimate would be infuriating if I weren’t so tired. And I am tired – exhaustingly so. It’s the type of tired that makes the day seem impossible. I didn’t want to get up, or walk the dog, or drive to work, or go to meetings. I just wanted to sleep a little more.
This morning it rained. I mean really rained. Lightening ripped through the sky, thunder shook the house. It’s the type of storm that makes everything else stop. I can’t take the dog for a walk in this… though he’s whining to go out. I know the minute he gets poured on, he’ll try to turn back or walk impossibly slow with his head down. I get frustrated with him and his just-audible-enough whine. I figure he should be able to reason through this the way a person can… as though he should know it’s raining and that he hates the rain… so why whine about it (said the guy writing, complaining, whining about his dog and the rain). I thought about getting ready, but some old wives’ tale about not showering during a thunderstorm gave me just enough pause that I didn’t do it. I’m not sure I was ever given a scientifically backed reason for not showering (or talking on the phone) during a storm, but something in my brain as a child conjured up images of water and phone lines being electrified, tiny bolts of lightening coming out of the shower head…. and that has, to some degree, stuck with me – at least enough to think twice about it. I also thought about running on the treadmill, but instead gave myself permission to settle in on the couch and watch the storm.
I’m a little proud of myself for pulling yesterday out of the crapper. Despite the sleep deprived start (damn those emails – and yes, I unsubscribed and listed them as spam), I fought through the crankies, got a few things done at work (never enough) and came home and exercised. It was only an ok workout, but it made exercising after work (when I’m usually too tired and hungry) seem possible. I was hungry, and what I really wanted to do was settle down with a glass of wine and relax, but I forced myself to switch everything up. It’s a little like this morning, breaking from the schedule-driven routine to sit and watch the storm, to lean in to the circumstances.
…
Double bonus points for coming home tonight and mustering the energy to run a few miles on the treadmill.