Inevitably, the moment I look in a different direction, diverting my attention ever so briefly during one of our walks, is the precise moment Kimbrough (my dog) walks in front of me or spies something and tries to give chase. A slight stumble over the pooch or an arm-yanking jolt, the message is always the same – don’t get distracted, always pay attention.
I’ve been thinking about that word quite a bit lately – attention. It is inextricably linked to time and effort which makes it a precious commodity – one worthy of… attention. Of attention, the philosopher Simone Weil wrote, “attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.” I believe that statement – deeply. I also believe it’s opposite to be true, that attention withheld can be a particularly cruel or effective form of punishment. Googling a few quotes about attention, I found everything from gratitude to practical advice to the spiritual.
I don’t have to chase extraordinary moments to find happiness – it’s right in front of me if I’m paying attention and practicing gratitude. – Brene Brown
The true art of memory is the art of attention. – Samuel Johnson
We all strive for balance, often moving to extremes to find ourselves somewhere in the middle where we can sustainably exist in optimal inspiration. Working toward balance takes a lot of ingredients. We need courage, reflection, attention, action, and a push-and-pull relationship between effort and relaxation. – Tara Stiles
To be an artist, you don’t have to compose music or paint or be in the movies or write books. It’s just a way of living. It has to do with paying attention, remembering, filtering what you see and answering back, participating in life. – Viggo Mortensen
Every year of my life I grow more convinced that it is wisest and best to fix our attention on the beautiful and the good, and dwell as little as possible on the evil and the false. – Richard Cecil
Etc. etc., you get the point. Of course, not all attention is the same. It is a multifaceted word. There is the attention that must be paid: to the road, to the dog, to the circular saw and the straight-line cut…. There is the attention we would rather not pay: worry, anxiety, depression, negativity. And there is the attention we sometimes miserly guard or lavishly spend – our passions, our loves, our core beliefs. At our best, we give it freely and abundantly and we find ourselves inescapably transfixed.
The school of positive psychology and gratitude (of which I am a sometimes skeptic and occasional practitioner) might have us confuse attention with will power. It incessantly preaches that we can choose to pay attention to good and beautiful things or not pay attention to bad things – as though it’s as easy as an on/off switch. While I believe we have a choice in how we give our attention and to what, I also think it’s easy to overlook the years of conditioning we’ve experienced on a personal level and the eons of conditioning we’ve experienced on an evolutionary level. Choosing what we pay attention to, being deliberate about it, living purposefully – requires work. Paying attention to threats serves as a survival mechanism. Remembering negative feelings or events helps us learn and grow… To suggest otherwise, or that the negative isn’t worth our attention seems unnatural and ingenuous. The tragedies in life, the hard lessons, remind us of how fleeting or fickle or unpredictable and precious life might be – so pay attention – to all of it.
It also seems that attention (effort) is closely related to commitment. Like most, if not all animals, we are constantly evaluating our commitments based on how much attention/effort will be required, for how long, and what’s the payout? Though I suspect humans are “worse” at this calculation than most other animals – or we’re more willing to ignore the data in front of us – often feeling the odds might not apply to us. We have a tendency towards hope, optimism, determination, and achievement – thankfully. We tend to stick things out hoping that through a combination of attention, effort, will, and luck we can improve our situation. This applies to the work we do, the relationships we pursue, the friends we keep, the houses we buy, and the mountains we climb. We know there might be a view just over the next ridge, the fixer-upper can become the cozy home, the marathon ends with the euphoria of accomplishment.
Tripping over the dog made think about how exhausting constant diligence can be… It also reminded me of the importance of those other forms of attention – the enjoyable, the unforced, the places we choose to go when nothing else demands our attention.