Today is my first real non-road trip COVID travel experience. I’m flying from State College, PA to Memphis, TN with a substantial layover in Chicago. I’m writing this from the Chili’s To Go in Chicago… and various other spots in the airport.
I spent the last two days driving from Memphis to State College (with an overnight stop in Louisville) as part one of my move (took the plants, the art, some clothing, and the car). I got in to State College last night a little before 8pm. I was tired and hungry, and with no motivation to unload the car. I spent the morning walking around Louisville (cool town) and then drove eight hours only stopping twice for gas and bathroom breaks. I had plans to get in, order some food, finish a freelance project, and get a few things in order for my trip back (schedule Uber, check-in to flights, etc.). I grossly underestimated how a few minor setbacks on top of an exhausting day would kill my motivation.
The choices from Uber eats were underwhelming – this was the first setback. It was a lot of fast-food joints and chains – which makes sense given that it’s a college town… but it’s not what I was looking for. I ordered a sandwich and unpacked the car. There aren’t a lot of places in the house that will get decent light. I’m not sure how the plants will fare. There’s also a clash between my style and the style of the house. I prefer clean and minimal with plants and very little clutter. The house has knick-knacks and fake autumn flowers in every corner. I’m more a fan of modern art, graffiti art and abstract art – the house is full of impressionism. I had trouble seeing it as my place. I walked around trying to figure out how I might make it a little more my own without fully taking the place over.
I also spent an inordinate amount of time trying to figure out how I’d get my coffee fix in the morning. There’s a Kuerig, but no k-cups, and there was no way I was going to get back in the car to go get some. At around 9pm I got a text from the airline. My 7am flight was delayed until 9am. This was the second setback. A delayed flight meant I’d miss my connecting flight by half an hour. I had planned my trip well. I was supposed to be back in Memphis before noon. With the delayed flight and a new flight from Chicago, I would have a four-hour layover and would get into Memphis a little before 4pm. The day was shot. Grrrr.
I rescheduled my flights and my Uber ride, but did little else and went to bed.
I got up early thinking I’d do that freelance work that I didn’t do last night. Again, I underestimated how tired I would be. I had no coffee and was moving slowly. I kept watching the clock and obsessing over my lack of caffeine. When I get this way, I start to think about stupid things like whether or not the café at the airport is before or after security. Will I be able to take my coffee in? And what if they’re not open? I wasted my early morning moments like this.
Fortunately, my Uber driver was pleasant… and he helped put a few things in context. He’s currently working as a courier driving all over central PA picking up COVID test samples and driving them to Philadelphia. He easily drives 400 miles a day. Suddenly, my little trip from Memphis didn’t seem so bad (he once did 1,000 miles in a day). His three-year-old car has over 200,000 miles on it. I felt a little like a wimp breaking my trip up in to two days, and even wimpier complaining about losing a day to travel.
Being the neurotic goody goody rule follower that I am, I arrived at the airport way too early (I’m used to bigger airports and longer waits and also getting there one to two hours before my flight). I forgot that you can pretty much roll up 30 minutes before take-off at these smaller airports. My earlier worries were not unfounded. The café was closed and the coffee machine in the terminal was out of order.
That was the long pre-amble to some thoughts on time, inconvenience, and rolling with it. It was a frustrating night and morning. Some of that was the lack of coffee. Some of it was just being off my game/schedule. But…. giving in and slowing myself down – rolling with it has turned what I thought would be a travel day from hell into a pleasant day. Once I accepted that the day I had planned was lost, I could create a new day. I’ve already finished the freelance work (did some of it on the plane), and I’ve had the luxury of time to sit and observe people. This is always when I feel at my best. When I can slow down and think and see and feel.
Airports are strange and fascinating places. So many people going so many places… each on their own, often hurried, schedule. I love to travel, but I hate being in a rush to do it. I’ve arrived at airports just in time. On one trip I lost my ticket and was freaking out checking my pockets 20 different times. I’ve had trips where I’ve had to run through the airport to make my connection. Given the choice, I prefer to have lots of time. This is a recurring theme with me. I feel like I’m always trying to learn to slow down a bit more.
Chili’s, where I started this post as a note on my phone, was the moment I chose to slow down a bit… was the moment I realized what a gift time can be. I didn’t want to go to Chili’s. I really wanted to just get some coffee. Starbucks and Dunkin were 20-30 people deep and McDonalds was worse. The airport… hurried, crowded – I wanted none of it. At Chili’s there was no line, but also just one waitress for the entire section, perhaps entire restaurant. I felt bad for her. She was hustling and I could feel the pressure she was under. It’s strange how we can feel what others are putting out there. Nothing seemed to be working properly. I tried to scan the QR code at my table to place my order, but it wasn’t working. This was the case for other tables as well. She apologized several times (to me and everyone else in the restaurant). This was the moment that I chose to let go. I could be ticked that I was stuck here for a few extra hours, or I could lean back and use my newfound luxury of time to be extra kind to the waitress and try to be one less hurried person in the crowd.
I’m not sure why I’m always surprised by the relief I feel when I slow down a bit – when I get out of my overly-planned, arrive early, be efficient mindset. I’ve written a lot about how in a recent relationship I was starting to see the world in a different way. I’ve always been somewhat laid back and able to roll with it… but I have lots of small moments of mild anxiety marked by rushing through life and arriving early for and anticipating whatever comes next. In that relationship, I was learning to let go of those things a bit. Now, outside of that, I try to teach myself to slow down. I suppose it’s another lesson in being the person I hope to find.