Rough and tumble storms have been rolling through Memphis this morning. It’s in the mid-sixties, there’s a lot of thunder and lightening. Seems a bit crazy for January. Yesterday I read that an organization in Australia made dire predictions for climate change – basically saying that by 2050, civilization will collapse in to chaos because of the disruptions of global warming. It’s on the more extreme side of the predictions, but I hate the thought of these things happening in my lifetime and my daughter’s lifetime. It’s the kind of stuff that makes you want to have someone with you when you face the apocalypse…
Last night I hung out with the woman I went out with the other night. We ordered Chinese at her place, had some drinks and talked. I don’t know if it’s a Memphis thing, a southern thing, a Tennessee thing… she pointed to the fortune cookies and said aren’t you going to see your fortune in bed? Apparently, it’s a thing to add the phrase in bed after you read your fortune. We cracked up at mine… “Be generous, and the favor will be returned within the week” – in bed. You can also add the words on the toilet after the fortune. Her dog was a complete attention whore with me. If I have any superpowers, it’s the ability to establish trust and get people to open up to me in a short amount of time, I’m really good with kids, and I’m a bit of a dog and cat whisperer.
As determined as I am to not date the way I used to (frenzied chaos), all the strangeness that comes with connecting with complete strangers is creeping back in to my life. I’m finding that talking with people and swiping profiles is eating in to my writing time – I didn’t write yesterday. The woman I went out with on Thursday already ghosted (for those not in the know, it’s the practice of just disappearing without ever saying something like “hey, had a nice time, not sure we’re a match.”) It happens a lot in online dating, and I’ve read that millennials have started doing this with their jobs and job interviews – they don’t show or just disappear…. I tie it to the newish movement in psychology centered on “positivism” – all that stuff about walking away from anything that doesn’t work for you. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a big fan of focusing on what brings you joy in life – but I’ve also been burned pretty badly by it.
This is another one of those throw-away posts. Written for the sake of habit as opposed to content. Instead of writing, I spent time yesterday editing my post on California – removed the pictures and replaced them with writing that felt defensive and on the verge of a rant…. I edit a lot – mostly for typos, but sometimes to bring more clarity. I try not to edit in the form of whitewashing. This was something we talked a little bit about last night. Neither of us go through and remove exes from facebook – they were part of our lives, they exist in the world. I have family pictures on my FB page from Christmas day when all of us would sit on the sofa at my mother-in-law’s house. I have pictures from when my ex-fiancee and I went to PSU and when we got engaged…
The rain continues. I’m tired, was up way too early this morning. I should run… I should spend less time staring at this screen. I should try to find some inspiration. What am I going to create today?